I am no Super Mom

After my post about feeding a toddler where I listed all the fun and healthy things I like to prepare for Noah’s lunch at daycare, one of the questions I got was: how do you do all that? How do you find time to work full time, commute to work every day, go grocery shopping, prepare meals, have family time, and not be completely exhausted at the end of the day? My short answer was: One, Noah has a Super Dad and two, it is all about priorities. 

Here’s my long answer. 

The most important aspect in how I manage family and a demanding full time job is that Noah has a Super Dad. Tony spends just as much time, if not more, taking care of Noah. Our days are pretty scheduled these days and this is what it looks like usually (on days that it works): 

5am: My alarm goes off at 5am every morning and I try to leave the house at 6am. Part of the reason is that my park & ride where I leave my car to get on the bus to go to work is usually completely full at 6:30am. Plus, that way I can avoid the morning rush hour. Leaving only 15 minutes can make my commute a lot longer.

7am: On good days I get to work at 7am. I don’t always make it that early, but have plenty of late evening calls and work to do in the evenings that make up for it. Tony and Noah get up sometime between 6 and 7am, have breakfast together, and get ready for the day.

8am: Around 8am every morning, Tony drops Noah off at daycare and starts his work day

3pm: On a perfect day, I leave work at 3pm, beat traffic coming home, and pick up Noah at 4pm. On a realistic day, I don’t make it there until about 5pm. Are you shocked yet at how much time he spends at daycare every day? I know it’s a long day for him, but that is part of why it’s so important to me that we picked a place that we are 100% happy and comfortable with. He loves it there and usually wants to keep playing when I come to pick him up. Yes, he is happy to see me, but he’s also not at the point where he “needs to get out of here”. I still feel terrible when I am stuck in traffic or have to wait for the bus for an hour (!), but Noah is thriving in his new class and having fun with his friends and teachers. And to be honest, there’s just no other option that would make sense (or any of us happier for that matter).

5:30pm: When we come home, Tony is often already waiting for us and we have about 1.5 hours before dinner time. On a sunny day we just spend time outside, or we go running, or we just hang out in the middle of the living room floor, letting Noah play with his toys and climb around on us while we try not to fall asleep.

7pm: At about 7pm, we eat. We usually prepare dinner together and make something quick and easy or eat leftovers. That’s what I love about summer – there’s nothing more quick and easy and delicious than throwing some meat and veggies on the grill. It also doesn’t hurt to have a potato or pasta salad already in the fridge. Today, we had this:

7:30pm: At about 7:30pm we try to start Noah’s bedtime routine, but that doesn’t always work out. I try to stay on schedule, but I don’t force it on us when it doesn’t make sense. Usually, it just turns out to be the time when he is done eating and gets tired anyway, so it works out. I am in charge of bed time most nights but Tony jumps in quite a bit when I am just too exhausted or have to work late. Noah takes his bath, which he loves, we read a book or two in his room, and then go to our bedroom to lay down. We sing songs, or tell stories, or count toes, until Noah (and sometimes both of us) fall asleep. 

It’s usually a process of 40-60 minutes. I’ve learned that trying to speed it up just doesn’t work; patience is the key; the more I try to make him fall asleep the longer it will take.

8:30pm: I start prepping Noah’s food for the next day, which can take about 20 minutes, depending on how I feel. By the time I’ve taken a shower and got ready for bed it’s usually 9pm. Sometimes I just go to bed, and sometimes Tony and I enjoy a quiet moment on the couch downstairs and watch an episode of our favorite show.

10pm: Tony and I go to bed.

I mentioned priorities as another factor. Notice how I didn’t mention laundry, the dishwasher, grocery shopping, etc.? That’s what weekends are for these days. Don’t ever come visit us on a Friday, I promise you the house will be a mess. 

That’s how we do it. It may not be the best way, but it works for us. Thankfully we both have flexible jobs and can jump in and help each other out when needed. I really don’t know how single parents do it. So – If you think I’m a Super Mom it’s all because Tony is a Super Dad and we make a great team.